Brandi Hawbaker: "I Did Not, Not Have Sex With Every Poker Player On The Planet!"
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Sources close to Brandi Hawbaker's vagina report there is only one remaining poker player on the planet - known simply as Wawfuls - that she has yet to bone.Asked about this not so startling revelation, Brandi denied such a rumor chuckling, "No way, he doesn't count 'cause he's not a poker player."
Brandi later noted, "I am comfortably confident I have not, not had sex with every poker player on the planet. I've knocked them all out, though I just got a report sent to my crackberry letting me know ANOTHER Asian kid at Georgetown University is contemplating dropping out of college to become an online poker pro. So I've got that going for me."
Asked about her recent trysts with poker players, Brandi admitted bumping uglies with Jimmy "gobboboy" Fricke after a heart stopping late night date at the local Vegas KFC buffet.
She later said, "I'm kind of hoping to get busy with Howard Lederer next...I mean again...now that he just won that 100k buy-in Aussie Millions event and all. I just texted him last night, but haven't heard back from him. I'm kind of worried though, if Howard doesn't call me back and this Asian kid doesn't pan out, I may just have to call that Wawfuls guy.
We have yet to reach sources close to Lederer's schlong to confirm or deny this latest information. In the meantime, Wawfuls weeps.
posted by TripJax @ 9:40 AM,
7 Comments:
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At 4:21 PM,
Chad C said...
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This whole post went to crap as soon as you typed "only one remaining poker player on the planet - known simply as Wawfuls - that she has yet to bone." See you called him a "poker player" and well that just ruins it for me :(
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At 7:37 PM,
said...
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POTY!
Ok, it's only January, but still, it's pretty good. -
At 9:46 PM,
TripJax said...
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Dang Chad, you only had to go one more sentence to get the goods.
And thanks BSN! -
At 3:46 PM,
StB said...
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There should be a warning at the top. NSFW!! Or any human eyes!
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At 11:34 PM,
lightning36 said...
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Which one has better boobs?
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At 3:53 AM,
iamhoff said...
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My eyes! My eyes! Trip, this has to be the best Brandi post evar! Well done. Now I need to rub Comet cleanser in my eyes to eradicate the images.
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At 5:13 AM,
said...
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BITCH !!!! FUCK YOU !!!! YOU ARE A SHAME TO ALLL WOMEN IN PLANET !!!
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